"I Have So Many Doubts"

These words finish the play Doubt written by John Patrick Shanley which I saw performed at the Alliance Theatre this evening. Though the entire piece takes place within a catholic school and three out of the four characters are either nuns or a priest, these "doubts" have less to do with what they believe about God than with what they believe about others. What we believe about others and the actions -whether sinful or righteous- we may take to uncover the truths behind those beliefs inevitably will "take us away from God." Though one nun seems to think it is worth that step away if truth is revealed in the end.

No matter what religious background one comes from this play strikes intrigue. Upon leaving a theatre I love listening to the conversations around me. Generally I'll hear one or two that are actually about the play while most are about the weather or where we should go to get a drink. Sitting in the lobby this evening I did not hear a single topic of conversation that didn't begin with some aspect of the play.

Doubt. Doubting whom was guilty or innocent, truthful or full of lies.

I don't want to say too much about the play itself. You should read it. It's a quick and interesting read. You should also see it. Which shouldn't be too hard since the rights were recently released and it's shown up in just about everybody's season this year. It's a play that hits you somewhere you forgot about. Like that ridiculously sore muscle you didn't know existed after an intense workout. Or the way a daffodil smells after a long winter. It makes you remember that doubt is a part of our life here, whether it creeps in slowly and unwanted or attacks you with full force, it comes and it goes. What if we could be sure of everything? What if the only thing we had to doubt was doubt itself? Then again, doubting the doubt may be one way of gaining certainty. Certainty we never would have had were it not for the initial doubt.

I may write more on this later. But I doubt it.